As you could see, my months of June and July were kind of crazy with the things I had going on...but the days I didn't have anything going on meant I sat at home on my couch. The end of July marked the end of my summer class. I got an A (high A) in the class and loved that it helped bring my G.P.A up from that B I had last semester. I LOVED the class and wish that instructor taught more classes. I would make the 3 hour drive just to have a class with him.
The end of July also meant the 2nd birthday without Crystal. She would have turned 27 on July 30th, so we had a birthday party for her. I made some rum flavored cupcakes...okay there may have been a LOT of rum in them! We had a little BBQ with family and friends and had a good time for the most part. I stayed sober because I was driving and on new medication. We left when all the drinking started because I don't have a desire to be around drunk people. I'm over that phase of my life. I don't mind if people have a few beers around me, but taking shot after shot after shot....on top of all those beers...just not my thing. I guess someone has to be the grown-up. Unfortunately Crystal's oldest son, Jaydan, wasn't able to make it to the party. His dad had some car trouble up in Ohio and couldn't get the car fixed in time. We missed seeing him, but understand the situation. The following day my mom and I took flowers and a cupcake over to Crystal's grave site and left them there for her. It's definitely gotten a lot easier to go over there and see her...if I have someone else with me. If I go alone, I'm a sobbing mess. I think the family needs to go visit her more often though because her grave looks crappy now that things have been taken down/stolen/etc. Sadly my grandma is buried at the cemetery right down the road from Crystal, but I haven't been to see her in a while. I need to start making a plan to go see them both more often.
Okay so that marked the end of July (that I can remember). Oh wait, the last day of July we got decent news. Kyle finally got a rating from the VA. He got a decent rating for a first try, but we found some discrepancies in the VA report b/c the doctor wrote incorrect information. Now the VA is telling us that the information cannot be amended by the doctor and will forever be in there incorrectly. We are going to meet with someone about everything next week to see what we can do and to see how to file another claim since they are saying his hearing loss and respiratory issues are not service connected. Ummm pretty sure the hearing loss came from having an IED blown up right outside the door of his vehicle...and the respiratory issue is why he was medically retired to begin with. Ugh I hate fighting the black tape to get anything done. He's still not on PTSD meds because his psychiatrist went on vacation and apparently has decided she doesn't want to return phone calls or send the meds now that she is back. I don't understand, but I know we have to keep fighting all the bullshit. Oh another note, we are trying to get Kyle in to see his primary care doctor on post. His liver enzymes are really high still and they are saying the ultrasound showed signs of fatty liver disease....therefore meaning someone needs to check it out. The VA is the one who found all this stuff but they won't even address it or treat him for it. Pretty sure I might sue the VA if my husband dies from fatty liver disease and nobody was willing to treat him for it. Ugh. I'm trying to stay positive though. Lord knows he seems to be in a permanently bad mood about things. He doesn't think he's acting different, but I can see it as clear as the words I'm typing right now. He is also not sleeping well. He tosses and turns so much that it keeps me awake half the night. I just wish they would prescribe the medications and that they help him because he can't sustain himself on this level of anger with the world.
So that was July....I'll move on to August in another post.
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